Pun Hell

Dawn: Cheesy? My God Trist, that was the worst pun ever.

Tristan: Yeah... sorry love. Hey where are we?

Dawn: I dunno.

They looked around them. All around them were corn stalks, well over their heads. Suddenly they heard a whirring sound from above and looked up. There, floating down from the heavens, was a giant flying saucer. It landed, creating a giant circle in the crops. The landing ramp extended and from out of the space ship came a giant alien, with a black belt tied around his... well I suppose it could be termed a waist. But it was more like an arm to him.

The alien moved towards Tristan and Dawn. Tristan pulled out a laser pistol and shot at the alien. The shot bounced off of the aliens chest however and it kept coming. Tossing the laser pistol aside, Tristan charged the alien, who then swept him aside in one fell swoop. Tristan fell to the ground, unconscious but breathing.

Dawn: Trist!

The alien looked at her, pulled a device out of its belt and shot her with it. She fell to the ground limp.

When they awoke, they were floating naked in two tubes, suspended in a green liquid of some sort. The alien was sitting in front of them, staring at them. Watching. Menacing.

Tristan tried to speak, but found he couldn't. He looked over at Dawn, admired her body (which he loved) for a moment, and then tried to see if there was some way to break out of his tube. Before he could find one however, the tube started draining of liquid. The alien then spoke.

Alien: Greetings Earthlings! You will be my vict... I mean spor... I mean torture vic... I mean subjects for the next few hours. Please enjoy yourself, for horrible pain awaits you.

With that he pushed a button. From behind him, Tristan heard a whirring sound. He then felt a cold hard metal shaft go up his butt. He yelped, partly in shock, partly in pleasure. It slowly expanded, then contracted. It repeated this process a few times, then retracted into the wall. An even larger shaft then whirred out and started going rapidly in and out of Tristans butt. Tristan started moaning. Finally, the instruments were finished with him, and he let out a sigh of orgasm and of relief.

Alien: What?! How did you manage to enjoy that Earthling?

Tristan: Simple. Practice makes perfect.

He then heard moans coming from the other tube, though they leaned towards pain where his own leaned towards pleasure.

Then, from out of nowhere, Santa Clause leapt into the room, slays the aliens and freed Dawn and Tristan. They crashed the spaceship into the White House, then went outside and started singing.

Oh My God, I was wrong
It was Earth, all a long
You've finally made a monkey
Yes you've finally made a monkey
You've finally made a monkey out of me!

Tristan: Such a great song, eh love?

Dawn: Yep. Now let's go have monkey sex.

Tristan: Wait... aren't we in pun hell...

Tristan and Dawn fall through the floor and into... Chapter 7 - The Final Level.